Hello there,
As late summer continues to unfold across the Sunshine Coast, I’m thinking about you and wondering—how authentically are you living your purpose?
Not the purpose someone else defined for you. Not the life path that seemed most practical or acceptable. Your actual purpose—the unique way you’re meant to contribute, create, and experience this life.
This month, we’re exploring something that matters deeply: how to design a life that reflects your authentic self rather than living one that simply happened to you.
The Purpose Confusion
Let me start by addressing what purpose isn’t. It’s not one perfect calling you have to discover. It’s not a job title or life achievement. It’s not something mystical that requires years of soul-searching to uncover.
Purpose is much simpler and more practical: It’s the alignment between your daily actions and your deepest values. It’s what brings you alive. It’s how you naturally contribute when you’re being most authentically yourself.
I think of someone I worked with recently—let’s call him James. He came to me feeling unfulfilled despite apparent success. Good job, stable relationship, financial security. On paper, everything looked right. But something felt profoundly wrong.
When we explored his actual purpose—not what he thought it should be, but what genuinely mattered to him—we discovered he’d built his entire life around other people’s values. His father’s value of financial security. His partner’s value of stability. Society’s value of conventional success.
His actual core values? Creativity, freedom, and authentic connection. None of which his carefully constructed life honoured.
Understanding this didn’t mean James quit his job or blew up his life. But it did mean he began making conscious choices to infuse purpose into his days. Small shifts that honoured his authentic self rather than continuing to perform someone else’s version of success.
Where Your Energy Actually Goes
The first step toward purposeful living is brutally honest awareness of your current reality.
Your time reveals your real priorities, not your stated ones. You can say family matters most while spending 60 hours a week at a job that drains you. You can claim self-care is important while giving yourself whatever’s left after everyone else’s needs are met (which is usually nothing).
I recently asked someone to track one typical weekday—where her time and energy actually went versus where she thought it went. The gap was stunning.
She believed she spent “plenty of time” on activities that energized her. Reality? About 15% of her day went to genuinely nourishing activities, while 50% went to obligations that left her depleted, and 35% went to numbing behaviours (scrolling, TV, activities that weren’t restful—just absent).
This wasn’t judgment. It was information. Once she saw the truth clearly, she could make conscious choices.
Try this yourself this week: Track one complete day. Note which activities genuinely energize you (you feel alive, engaged, like time disappears in a good way) versus which deplete you (you feel exhausted, disconnected, like you’re going through motions).
Don’t judge what you discover. Just notice. Because awareness always precedes change.
Values Beyond Expectations
Purpose flows from values—what genuinely matters to you beneath the layers of external expectations, cultural conditioning, and absorbed beliefs.
Most people have never actually clarified their authentic values. They know what they think should matter. What their family valued. What seems impressive or acceptable. But their actual core values? Often buried under years of adaptation.
Rachel came to see me feeling perpetually exhausted despite working incredibly hard. She was achieving, productive, checking all the boxes. But nothing felt meaningful.
When we explored her values, she discovered she’d built her entire career around her mother’s value of helping others (she worked in a helping profession she didn’t actually care about) and society’s value of career achievement (she pursued promotions she didn’t want) while her actual core values were creativity, beauty, and solitude.
No wonder she felt exhausted. She was working incredibly hard at someone else’s life.
Understanding her authentic values let Rachel make different choices. Not dramatic overnight changes, but conscious shifts: protecting time for creative projects, choosing roles with more independent work and less people management, saying no to commitments that drained her authentic energy.
Small realignments. Significant impact.
This week, ask yourself: If you knew no one would judge your choices, what would genuinely matter most to you? Connection? Freedom? Creativity? Growth? Service? Peace? Adventure? Beauty?
Now look at your actual life. How much of it actively honours these values?
The gap between authentic values and lived reality is your purpose gap.
The Gap Is Information
Here’s what I want you to understand: The gap between your current life and your authentic purpose isn’t failure or inadequacy. It’s simply information about where you’ve been living according to external expectations rather than internal truth.
Michael rated key areas of his life—work, relationships, health, personal growth, creative expression, contribution, joy. Three areas scored particularly low: creative expression (2/10), personal growth (3/10), and contribution/service (3/10).
When we looked at what those three areas had in common, the pattern became clear: They were all parts of himself he’d put “on hold” after becoming a parent and focusing on financial stability. His work provided security but no creative outlet. He’d stopped learning or growing. He wasn’t contributing in ways that felt meaningful.
He realized he’d been waiting for “someday” to honour these parts of himself. But someday never comes unless you make it today.
Understanding his purpose gap let Michael make conscious choices. Not a complete life overhaul, but practical shifts: volunteering with a youth coding program one Saturday a month (contribution + creativity), taking a furniture-making workshop he’d been thinking about for years (creative expression + personal growth).
Purpose doesn’t require dramatic change. It requires conscious alignment.
This Week’s Practice
As you move through this week, I invite you to build your foundation for purposeful living:
1. Energy Audit: Track where your time and energy actually go for one complete day. Notice what energizes versus depletes you.
2. Values Clarity: Identify your 3-5 core authentic values—not what should matter, but what does matter to you. Describe what honouring each value looks like in daily life.
3. Purpose Gap Assessment: Rate your satisfaction in key life areas. Notice patterns in your lowest scores. What do they reveal about where you’re living others’ expectations rather than your own truth?
4. One Small Shift: Choose one tiny way to honour your authentic values this week. Not a life overhaul. Just one conscious choice toward alignment.
Remember, you’re not trying to achieve perfect purposeful living. You’re building awareness of where alignment exists and where it doesn’t. That awareness creates choice. And choice creates change.
Notice with gentle curiosity:
• What surprised you about where your energy actually goes?
• Which values feel most authentically yours versus absorbed from others?
• What patterns emerge in your purpose gap assessment?
• What small shift toward alignment feels doable this week?
Seasonal Wisdom
Late summer on the Sunshine Coast offers its own teaching about purpose. The season shows us full expression—nature bringing forth everything it has to offer without holding back. Trees heavy with fruit. Gardens in abundant bloom. Life expressing itself fully.
Yet there’s also the subtle shift beginning—the light changing quality, the first hints of autumn transition. Full expression while preparing for natural evolution.
Your purpose works this way too. It’s not one static thing you find and lock in forever. It evolves as you do. The key is showing up fully to this season of your life while remaining open to natural transitions.
What wants full expression from you right now? What’s your current season asking for?
Join the Journey
I’m sharing regular practices and insights on Instagram, Facebook, or LinkedIn throughout February. Follow along for support as you explore purposeful living.
I’d love to hear what you’re discovering. What surprised you about your energy audit? Which values feel most authentically yours? Where’s your purpose gap showing up? Share your insights or reach out if you’d like to explore deeper support.
Your life is your greatest creative work. Let’s design it together.
With warmth,
Gemma-Lee
About the Author:
Gemma-Lee Harvey is a Holistic Counsellor and Lifestyle Coach based on Australia’s Sunshine Coast. With a diverse background spanning psychology, business, counselling, and coaching, she creates a nurturing space for exploring one’s full potential. Her gentle yet practical approach kindles the transformative spirit within, guiding individuals through life’s challenges as they rise through empowerment.
Contact:
🌐 www.phynixbydesign.com.au
☎ 07 5493 6742
📱 0448 562 814
🏢 Brightwater Wellness Hub, Shop 7E 69-79 Attenuata Drive, Mountain Creek QLD 4557
Opening hearts & facilitating transformations since 2017
Phynix By Design ~ Life Reignited